Crazy Bra Day

I straightened out the shoes on the back mat Saturday. I hung curtains on the last few naked windows. I did two loads of laundry, hot glued a broken toy, tightened a loose bolt on the table, checked the mail, hit the store for soup and Kleenex, and played Guitar Hero with my daughter to make the world go away for a while. Yesterday I called my mother, talked to my aunt (which I’ll blog about, because damn), did some research on a novel, actually wrote for a while, watched a movie, made dinner and wished for Monday to wait a day. Throughout the weekend there were twitters from various people, some emails, and a few phone calls.

One in particular made the rest of the weekend just as insignificant as it really was.

So many people are worried about the big picture. They panic about what they can’t control and worry that what they do control doesn’t actually affect anything. Well, screw that. The big picture doesn’t happen without the little pieces. The Mona Lisa didn’t happen without the paint. And what do you suppose it would look like if DaVinci had run out of brown paint? Better yet, if he had run out of brown paint, would he have worried the shop didn’t have more? Would he panic there could be a global shortage of the pigments necessary for that particular shade? Or would he have just gone and found it, controlled what he could, fix what he needed, and then gone back and finished painting that ugly woman. Yeah, I can just see him crying in his beer at a local pub because he ran out of brown and was too afraid they wouldn’t have more, so he never bothered looking. Screw that. He went and got the paint.

That phone call though—the one that made me realize how truly insignificant most of what we do on a day-to-day basis is—really was important in and of itself. And not because it was pertinent to the body on the other end, or even myself, but because it was something more people need to think about. It’s about the little things, and more importantly, the little things you can control.

Most of you have no idea the medical nightmare I’ve been in for two years, because that’s not me. That’s not this blog. For the record, this year is much better than last year was. But I bring it up now for a reason, to tell you what I did during that and ask you all to join me in repeating that insanity. See, I spent the Halloween season of 2007 at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN. I didn’t know if I was living or dying, how long I had, or even what I had. I spent several weeks being medically raped in various ways by specialists, all while wearing those oh-so-sexy open-backed hospital gowns. I couldn’t control the procedures. I couldn’t control the hospital lingerie. Hell, I couldn’t even control my own body deciding I was the enemy. But I could control my attitude… and I fought back. Every time they put me in one of those nasty gowns, I fought the system with a smile because my exposed butt was covered with glow-in-the-dark Halloween panties. Not exactly what you would normally wear to the doctor’s, right?

Now, keeping that in mind and jump back to that phone call this weekend. This friend has got some things she can’t control running her mind into circles, her emotions into the ground and her physical strength into extinction (as lack of sleep is apt to do). But she can control a few things. I told her about my Mayo undies and ordered her to go shopping for a crazy bra. Fun color, fun style, beads, bows, whatever. Something she wouldn’t normally wear under her business clothes. And then wear it, and smile inside because she’s controlling something she can. No one knows. They don’t have to. She does.

But it goes beyond her. As I said before, far too many people worry about what they can’t control. And again, screw that. I’m declaring today National Crazy Bra Day. Control what you can. Enjoy the little stupid things that make the big picture more colorful and full of life. Laugh at a bad joke and smile at a stranger… and wear the craziest bra you own under your work clothes. If you don’t own a crazy bra, how about some insane undies? Of course, so the men aren’t left out, we can expand that thought. Wear something rebellious: they make glow in the dark undies for you too! Or go with mismatched socks, a Looney Tunes necktie, a bad hat, whatever. Do it to make a stand for the little things.

Do it because you can.

Because all those stupid little things we can control are important. It’s not the famous painter or the ugly woman in the Louvre that’s important. It’s the brown background and brown dress and brown hair and flat expression with just a hint of a smirk… Ever wondered why she was smirking? Perhaps it’s because underneath that boring 16th century garb, she’s wearing a pair of hot pink bloomers!

0 Responses to Crazy Bra Day

  • I haven’t been reading your blog long, but this should be listed as a Best Post Ever.

    My best friend lost her right breast to cancer, she had a little rubbery one in place of it. While getting ready for her birthday night on the town with girlfriends, she bent over to fasten the strap on her uber sexy high heels and her boob fell out. She lived far away, but she called me that night to tell me the story and we laughed for hours.

    I went to visit her a few months after that and she was in the kitchen putting some hot water on for tea. She walked out of the kitchen and threw her boob at me. Thank God I caught it. LOL

    She died in January, so all I have left of her is memories but when I think of all the boob throwing, how can I not laugh?

    In her honor, I’m wearing my Invisible Bra today.

  • Alethea says:

    I wore the crazy bra because you told me to…but the crazy undies were my own decision this morning. They don’t match, and I don’t care. Because We Are Fabulous.

    Don’t Forget To Be Awesome. xoxox

  • Bob Ford says:


  • Lauren says:

    I love wearing crazy bras/panties. And socks too. At work I’m only supposed to wear black socks but I buck the system. ;-)

  • Pat says:

    Kelli. I loved your blog about Crazy Bra Day! It is so true that we can’t always control the things that happen to us, but we can control our attitude. I love the quote that says “If you can’t control the wind, adjust your sail.” -Unknown

    It is disgraceful that hospitals still make people wear those ugly, flimsy and way-too-humiliating hospital johnnies. Doesn’t the hospital staff have any idea how these disgusting gowns make us FEEL?? Just because I’m in the hospital, doesn’t mean I want to LOOK sick!

    Fortunately today, patients can and are fighting back against the system and are wearing something rebellious – like colorful crazy hats, mismatched socks, or elegant designer hospital gowns which are made out of nice fabrics. There are more attractive and dignified hospital gowns which people can buy and bring with them to the hospital so they don’t have to suffer the indignities of the awful hospital johnny. (Even women who are giving birth are starting to bring in their own trendy “labor and delivery” gowns so they look more stylish and dignified!) What’s even more exciting is that plus size hospital gowns that actually fit are also available so us larger women don’t have to worry about the added embarrassment of having to wear two gowns just to cover up!

    What these personal clothes and accessories scream out (just in case the medical professionals don’t get it!) is “I am a person who is worthy of respect! I am more than my illness/diagnosis! So treat me like a human being – as a whole person and not just my medical condition.”

    I think it is so important to make a stand for the little things, because those are the things that help us keep our dignity intact. And in fighting back by wearing “crazy clothes” (which by the way I do not think is “crazy” but rather very healthy in terms of attitude!) I think we are actually empowering ourselves for the mind and body healing process ahead. We are taking control of what we can in order to facilitate our own peace of mind and well being. So rock on, Kelli and I, too will wear my craziest bra, not just in the hospital, but every day. So thanks for reminding me again that it’s the little things in life that make a difference!

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