Finding My Funny

Somewhere between the Thanksgiving shark attacks and last week’s adventures in insanity, I lost my sense of humor. This time of year, it’s quite important to keep/have your sense of humor, and it is vital to the Christmas spirit. More importantly, it’s healthier—even black humor is better than no humor. Luckily, the divorce papers included the “whim clause.”  When it is the other parent’s weekend, you are free to do whatever you want. There is no one to ask permission of and no one to answer to, so feed the cats and do whatever strikes your fancy.

Thankfully, I have been avoiding the shopping crowds and my mood wasn’t completely downgraded to “genocide rocks!” Instead, after the third mini candy cane of the morning on Friday, I decided to grab a clean pair of underwear and the laptop, and promptly skipped town. I called mom to warn her. She didn’t answer. I called the brothers to see when Christmas break started. They said now and that they were heading back. “I’ll race you home… and pack your magic cards!”

A plethora of normal family humor snapped me out of the funk quickly.  I learned that a family of geeks should NOT watch “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader.” I later remembered—between mandatory bonding moments, the feeb count and microwaving cats—how “normal” is silly and funny and light-hearted in my world.

And then mom asked how the re-gifting was going.

Last week I promised to tell you how to do Christmas on the cheap. Of course, it was a snarky promise because it referred to re-gifting, with flair! See, last time I was over here, I told my family that divorce is expensive and I’m momentarily poor, so I’m re-gifting this year. I then proceeded to look around the house suspiciously and when mom asked what I was doing I told her, “I’m figuring out what to steal so I can wrap it and give it back to you at Christmas.” She laughed, told dad, and then tried to explain that that’s not how re-gifting works. [It should be interjected here that my mother and I play the re-carding game at Halloween every year. We send Halloween cards back and forth throughout the month of October, and if we’re stumped because the stores suck this year, we pull out previously sent cards and put post-it notes over the other’s signature and sign it ourselves.] When I left that weekend, while hugging mom, I was scanning the room behind her and she laughed again and told me to get out.

I told Alethea about re-gifting with flair and we came up with some really horrible things [horrible in a good way, as we both swam as fast as we could from the sharks towards our funny bones], as well as some that weren’t necessarily re-gifting, just cheap and dirty and fun. When mom asked this weekend, I filled her in… and then mom, the siblings and I came up with more horrible ways to use humor and re-gifting. Here’s a few of those…  [Join the fun and respond with your own wickedly evil, but funny, re-gifting/cheap ideas!]

Half-burned candles [I didn’t like the scent, maybe you will].
Empty wine bottle [with a note stating: I bought this to share with you—my half was on the bottom].
Envelope with a note inside that says “thought”, because it’s the thought that counts.
All your single socks, in hopes that their dryer will find pairs.
Empty jar with just about anything inspirational on it [college fund, shrink fund, bail fund].
All the loose twist ties in your kitchen, because you can’t just buy those!

It’s Sunday morning now and I’m happy to report that I found my funny. Now, however, I have to find the road underneath the lastest winter storm and see how long it takes to get home. If I post this, I made it [as I always write these on Sunday for posting on Monday].

Happy Humor Holiday Holidaze, everyone… and remember to keep your sense of humor through the festivities!!

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